Compassion and Understanding

The support groups for people on the registry and their families daily hear horror stories of how community notification has affected someone’s lives. It’s strange in the country with diversified religions, almost all of them based on compassion and forgiveness, that people have failed to see the damage that is being caused to not only the offenders, but also their spouses, children and other family members.  I wonder when our American society is going to start showing this forgiveness, understanding and compassion that we as Americans say that we are so proud of. In the information below somehow I can’t but wonder if the five or six complaints that the landlady had came from people who consider themselves to be religious, and if so, how they will justify their actions on Judgment Day.

One of our members had this experience,

Well, it happened. After living in this apt for 6 months, the flyers went out and less than 24 hours later the landlady was knocking on my door. I’m month to month here, not much I can do about it. The landlady was nice, said it wasn’t fair but she’s had 5 or 6 complaints, she even gave me a hug and said she was sorry. She offered me another unit at another complex she owns but it is about 2/5’s the size of this apt for only $25 less a month, not even big enough for a couch AND a bed and probably not enough room for my computer desk so I just can’t take it, I’ve been in cells bigger than that. I’m already in one of the worse parts of town. If that wasn’t bad enough, someone turned my breaker off at around 5am this morning. No one is going to say or do anything to my face, I’m a big muscular guy, 5′ 11″ and 200 lbs of hard muscle and stronger than I look actually. I’m afraid of what I might do if I catch the person who did it.

For all my physical strength though, my mental and emotional strength are zero. I’m barely hanging on folks. I just found out my best friend probably has terminal cancer and I’ve been on the phone with her, trying to calm her and get her to stop crying. I’m dealing with my elderly parents and helping them and it’s a tremendous mental and emotional struggle to do so. Part of my family, who know about my situation, whom I was depending on for emotional support and a part time job, have decided to wait until I moved here to turn their back on me. I have a bad case of PTSD. I’m trying to get back into programming but I have no connections and I’m not sure I have the wherewithal to do the things I need to do to be a self employed programmer. Somehow I have to clear my mind of all this while trying to re-learn and get back to the programming world. Honestly I just want to go to sleep forever, but I won’t while my parents are still alive. When they’re gone I’m about 80 percent certain I’ll check out. I don’t want to live in this world without unconditional love. I’ve had good women who knew I was an RSO, beautiful and successful, who ultimately left me for the other things that come with being an RSO…..low income and inability to travel. It’s a tough pill to swallow when the woman who calls you ‘soulmate’ who was really the only woman I ever loved tells me via email one week before I was to move in her that even though it would be her dream to be with me, she wants to live in a nice house, have nice things and take vacations. I can’t afford any of those things and more than likely never will.

So that’s what’s going on. And I’ve been a registered citizen for 22 years, almost my entire adult life and it’s just getting worse and worse. I’m beaten down and tired…..have no hope

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