Who’s the real enemy?

Those that have read my previous articles shouldn’t be surprised by this new one, but to those who have never read my articles, this may hit hard and strike a nerve. Alas, I will not apologize for what I write, nor will I be sympathetic to the fact that you are a registrant, as I am one as well.

Being on the sex offender registry or having a family member on the registry is a very trying situation. It brings with it a lifetime for some of hardships, ridicule, discrimination. Finding housing, and employment become a seemingly impossible feat, which paves the way for depression, anxiety and all the other health risks involved. This, however, is where I will stop your train of thought. This is not an article aimed towards coddling someone’s feelings and telling you that everything is going to be ok. This is an article aimed at the fact that the registry is not your biggest enemy, you are.

I have been on the registry seven years now, and I have had my share of hardships from it. However, I also now have multiple college degrees, moved several times, had a few well-paying jobs and much more. Some ask me how I do it, and my answer is simple, I just do! The things in life that do not kill you will always make you stronger, sitting around wallowing in your own self-pity is not going to make your life better, but getting up and moving forward will. When faced with not being enrolled in college because of my criminal conviction, I took it to the state education board and won within minutes just by talking to them. Yes, the registry makes life hard, yes you will face hardships and dark storms, the key is to always be the bigger storm, and always have the loudest growl in the pack. Seven years ago, I never would have believed that within ten years I would be happily engaged, and soon to be married, have a near six-figure job, own a new truck, and be well on my adventure of starting a family.

Now to those getting angry and saying “You’re not in my situation, you had a better chance or more money”, Folks, I came from the epidemy of jack diddly squat and a childhood filled with abuse and beatings, but as I said, what doesn’t kill me makes me stronger. You are disabled by your mental condition, I.E self-pity and woe is me, not by your criminal background. Take for example someone who has lost their legs, they are faced with two choices now, wallow and become depressed, or strap on some prosthetics and learn to walk again. Always strive to be the best version of yourself, strive for greatness. You can never go back and start over but you can start any day and write a new ending.

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